Monday, March 22, 2010
First day of Spring 2010
Woke up to a clean bedroom, I spring cleaned it yesterday. Life is so good. I woke up from a dream about a depressed young mom whom I talked to. In the dream I told her that the person she is today is the same person she will be tomorrow. If she is upset today about life she will be upset tomorrow about life. As long as we believe that happiness is outside of us we will continue to be unhappy. When we understand that happiness really comes from within and that today is beautiful just the way it is and we stop looking for perfection in our life then and only then we will be free to enjoy this day. How easy it is to get wrapped up in what we think our life is missing. How easy is it to blame others for our unhappiness. When I woke up the dream was so real and I realized it was for me. I am learning more everyday how to let go of assuming I know what others think and that I am the reason others act the way they do. I am the only one who thinks the way I do. I will stop thinking I know how others think. I will stop living outside of my wonderful day and let go of yesterday, tomorrow and live this wonderful moment.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
celebrating change a whole year
Yesterday, I celebrated March 13, for a year ago on that day something happened that changed my life completely. My hot water tank broke.
I had been living in an old mobile home for 15 years. I wanted to move out but kept holding on to all the memories. You see in my whole life I had never lived in one spot for more than 5 years. I had also remodeled the home in several places like the kitchen and bathrooms. I kept hoping I would be able to fix up the old home. But I kept dreaming of living in a beautiful apartment that didn't need any work.
Well the hot water tank breaking was the last straw. My home was paid off and it was either put money into a new water tank or use the money to move out.
On March 15th my daughter, Vicki and I looked at apartments and picked one. We were moved into the apartment by the end of the month with the help of family members.
I was slow to adjusting to the change. But with time I overcame the change and became aware of how wonderful life can be when you finally let go.
I walk around this apartment in awe of how beautiful life really is. I could go on and on about all the things I learned living here, but the most important thing I learned was that the fear of giving up something I thought I needed was the biggest lie I had ever believed. Letting go of the past and future and living today is more wonderful than I could have ever guessed.
I had been living in an old mobile home for 15 years. I wanted to move out but kept holding on to all the memories. You see in my whole life I had never lived in one spot for more than 5 years. I had also remodeled the home in several places like the kitchen and bathrooms. I kept hoping I would be able to fix up the old home. But I kept dreaming of living in a beautiful apartment that didn't need any work.
Well the hot water tank breaking was the last straw. My home was paid off and it was either put money into a new water tank or use the money to move out.
On March 15th my daughter, Vicki and I looked at apartments and picked one. We were moved into the apartment by the end of the month with the help of family members.
I was slow to adjusting to the change. But with time I overcame the change and became aware of how wonderful life can be when you finally let go.
I walk around this apartment in awe of how beautiful life really is. I could go on and on about all the things I learned living here, but the most important thing I learned was that the fear of giving up something I thought I needed was the biggest lie I had ever believed. Letting go of the past and future and living today is more wonderful than I could have ever guessed.
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